What if getting to our goals is actually much easier than our minds tell us?
And what if it’s our mind simply believing that it’s hard—like a kind of placebo effect where we convince ourselves that the journey has to involve some struggle?
What if challenge is not something to avoid but something that we can have fun with, and part of God’s brilliant design for us? Not as punishment, but because challenge is how we grow.
I’ve done my fair share of avoiding challenge and clenching my teeth and holding my breath through challenge . . . but lately I’ve been low key obsessed with learning how to meet challenge with fun, joy, and ease.
But of us were never taught how. We were taught the way of stress, numbing, or complaining. So we reach for what I call outer soothing.
Outer soothing is when you try to feel better by adding something from the outside: alcohol, scrolling, cannabis, sugar. For me it was coffee. And food when I wasn’t hungry.
I can remember mornings when I was already on my third cup of coffee, telling myself, “I just need this to get through.” And sure, it gave me a little lift. But underneath, my body was wrecked. My nervous system was fried. The coffee that I loved didn’t actually support or nourish me . . .it just covered over the exhaustion and pushed me further into depletion.
That’s the thing about outer soothing: the intention is innocent. You just want to feel better. And feeling good is your birthright!
You simply want to shift your state. But when we aren’t living the path of embodiment (finding comfort on the inside), all of the seeking to feel better is a slow form of self-harm. It creates inflammation, not to mention the longer term impact of dimming our inner shimmer and weighing down our spirit.
The alternative is what I call inner alchemy.
Instead of numbing, you tranmute. You learn how to shift your state from the inside out:
- A breath that steadies you.
- A movement that shakes or massages out what’s stuck in your tissues.
- A sound that opens space in your contracted body.
Embodiment is the missing link for most people. Without it, we’ll keep going back to outer soothing—thinking we’re helping ourselves, but really digging the hole deeper.
With it, challenge becomes fuel. And nourishment comes from the inside, so that we no longer even feel the need to soothe (and likely harm) ourselves from the outside.
Love,
Meghan
PS if you haven’t yet watched my training on how to stop emotional eating with bio-intelligence rather than diets or willpower, check it out here.